Details

BBB found Serial Vapist sitting glumly on the curb outside the Kuandu Museum of Fine Arts. “Bummer, they wouldn’t accept your films either?” BBB asked. “Those Philistines! They wouldn’t know great art if it came on their face,” said Serial Vapist, throwing his vape down on the ground in disgust, then pulling another out of his pocket. “I’ve never seen your films,” said BBB, “do you have them on your phone?” “Yes, I’ll show you,” said Serial Vapist, pulling out a few vapes from his pocket before he finally found his phone and started scrolling. “This is a film of me staring into the camera and smoking wordlessly for seventeen hours, which I call ‘Un pangolin andalou’. This is a compilation of overly long and stationary shots of random alleys and rooms where nothing happens, which I call ‘There’s No Place Like Home.’ This is a film of a Lion Dance with the brightness and volume set so low that it’s just blackness and silence, which I call ‘A Metaphor for Erectile Dysfunction.’” “You’re right, they do not appreciate your genius,” said BBB, moved to tears. BBB發現Serial Vapist沮喪地坐在關渡美術館外的路邊。 “可惡，他們也不接受你的電影作品嗎？” BBB問道。 “那些世俗份子！ 就算有最偉大的藝術作品在他們眼前他們也不會懂不知道的！”Serial Vapist說，生氣地把他的電子煙扔在地上，然後從口袋裡又掏出另一支。 “其實我從來沒有看過你的電影，”BBB說，“你現在手機上有嗎？” “當然有！來，我來給妳看看，”Serial Vapist說，從口袋裡東掏西掏拿出好幾支電子煙後，終於找到手機。他滑著螢幕， “這部影片是我深深地緊盯著鏡頭，完全沒有台詞然後連續抽了十七個小時的煙，我取名為’法式煙霧瀰漫’。 另外這部是我使用了一種靜止跟漫長的拍攝方式去呈現隨機的巷弄及房間，那裡什麼都沒發生。然後我彙集了這些隨機地點編輯成的影片，我取名為’還是家裡好’。還有這部，這是一個舞獅電影，我把亮度和音量設定得非常低，只剩下黑暗和寂靜，我取名為’陽痿的隱喻’。 “你是對的，他們不欣賞你的才華，”BBB說，感動得流淚。 “Anyway, would you like to hear my experimental bash concept for our Hash run?” said Serial Vapist. “The primary narrative is Costco corporate shill. Poor ass hashers who usually skip the bash need worry not! Our deconstructed ‘bash’ will be at a downtown location consisting of huge piles of food bought at Costco and brought over by car, subverting the meanings of space and motion and hopefully filling everyone up for under 250NT each.” “Buddy, do you even have a Costco membership?” asked BBB. “No,” admitted the Vapist. “Do you have a car?” asked BBB. “No,” admitted the Vapist, “but I’m sure we can find some helpful hashers who do.” Mijo Slut sped by suddenly in his Maserati, splashing Serial Vapist from a puddle. “Bye-bye, broke-ass bitches!” he shouted while giving them the finger. “Hey! My name is ‘Big Brown Balls!’” shouted BBB. Serial Vapist sighed, then exchanged his soggy vape for a dry one. “對了，妳想聽聽我對我們這次路線後晚餐安排的實驗性概念嗎？” Serial Vapist說。 “這是個專注在敘述好市多公司的那些假顧客真推銷。 通常不參與晚餐的捷兔跑者不用再擔心了！ 我們這個最摩登的“晚餐”概念將在方便的市中心舉行，然後我們會從好市多買來滿山滿谷的美食並派專車運送過來，這不只顛覆了傳統空間和運動的意義，還預計以每人250元以下的預算填飽大家。” “夥伴，你有好市多的會員嗎？” BBB一語道破問。 “沒有啊，”Vapist坦承。 “那你有車嗎？” BBB又問。 “沒有啊，”Vapist再坦承，“但我相信我們能找到一些可以幫忙的捷兔跑者。” Mijo Slut突然開著他的瑪莎拉蒂飛馳而過，從水坑裡濺出Serial Vapist一身泥濘。 “再見，破產的笨蛋們！” 他搖下車窗，對著兩隻野兔比了中指。 “嘿！ 我的名字是 Big Brown Balls!” BBB吼回去。Serial Vapist嘆了口氣，然後把他溼漉漉的電子煙丟下，換上一隻新的乾的。 Just then, Dick with a Bigger Cam came gaily out of the museum, smiling and carrying a comically large burlap sack of money with a $ sign on it. “What! Don’t tell me the museum bought your photos,” said Serial Vapist, green with envy and nicotine poisoning. “Actually,” said the Hash Flash, “remember in Down Island when, in an artistic rage, you jerked off onto my camera?” BBB turned to see the hare’s expression, but Serial Vapist just puffed away silently. “Well, the camera was on and recording video at the time. I just sold that film to the museum. They loved it! The curators said it was as if great art hit them in the face.” Serial Vapist said nothing, but clenched his fist so hard he crushed his vape. 就在這時，Dick with a Bigger Cam喜滋滋地從美術館走出來，面帶滿足笑容，背著一個印有誇張美元錢幣標誌的大麻布袋。 “蛤！ 不要告訴我美術館買了你的照片，”Serial Vapist說，整個臉因為羨慕嫉妒恨及尼古丁中毒變成綠色。 “噢，事實是，”捷兔專業攝影師繼續說到，“還記得去年在Down Island嗎？你以藝術的憤怒對著我的相機打手槍那次，” BBB轉過身去看主兔的表情，但Serial Vapist只是默默地抽著電子煙。 “哈哈哈，當時相機是開著，正在錄製影片。 我剛把那部電影賣給了美術館。 他們愛死了！ 策展人說，你射出的瞬間彷彿就像是偉大的藝術熱騰騰地擊中了他們的臉。” Serial Vapist 不發一語，只是拳頭慢慢變緊，壓扁了他的電子煙。 Credits Banner: CSO and Limp of Shame Story: Praying for Man Tits Translation: Minor Pusher ******WHO? / 誰?****** Hare 主兔: Serial Vapist Cohare 副兔: Big Brown Balls ******WHAT? / 蝦咪******* A:A run / 路線：A to A S: 6.5 km + Elevation/ 爬升: 200 m L: 9 km + Elevation/ 爬升: 300 m *******WHEN / 啥時******* Date: Sunday, 23 Feb 2025 Time: Hares off at 14:00 兔子兩點起跑 *******WHERE / 哪兒******* Guandu Park 關渡公園 https://maps.app.goo.gl/YDy6wLNQfSkH9m3QA ******HOW? / 怎去******* MRT to Guandu Station 捷運關渡站 *******PRICE******* Men $250 Women $200 *******BASH / 晚餐******* Guandu Park 關渡公園 Costco Bash https://maps.app.goo.gl/YDy6wLNQfSkH9m3QA

Book Now

mailto:taiwanhashhouseharriers@gmail.com?subject=TwH3 #2594 Inquiry

When & Where

February 23, 2025 (2:00 pm) – February 23, 2025 (6:00 pm)

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