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Once upon a time, Subbanger put on her little red running dress, picked up her coolbag, and ran out to visit Grandma Super Do Me, who was poorly after a night of drinking. “La la la! I’m a pretty girl!” sang Subbanger as she skipped her shiny black school shoes along flowy trails, technical shiggy, and crunchy gravel. 從前從前，Subbanger穿上她的小紅裙，拿起她的保溫袋去探望宿醉未醒的奶奶Super Do Me 「啦啦啦！我是個漂亮女孩！」Subbanger一邊唱著歌，一邊穿著她那黑得發亮的皮鞋，沿著蜿蜒的小徑、崎嶇不平的山路和嘎吱作響的碎石路一路小跑。 “Hello squirrel! Hello mange-ridden dog!” she called out, the hem of her skirt brushing against the soft grass flanking eminently runnable dirt paths. The insolent brat ran right out of the mountains and into the city center. “Hello traffic light! Hello crowds!” she squealed with joy. 「你好，松鼠！你好，疥癬狗！」她充滿活力的打著招呼，裙擺拂過那片柔軟的草地就在適合跑步的土路兩旁。 這個傲嬌的小傢伙直接從山裡跑進了市中心。 「你好，紅綠燈！你好，人群！」她興奮地尖叫。 At last she arrived at Grandma Super Do Me’s gingerbread cottage in Dadaocheng. She was lying in bed, and looked… different. And hairy. “What big hands you’ve got, grandma!” exclaimed Subbanger. “All the better to carry flour with,” growled Grandma, “Is there a beer in that chilly bin?” “And what big sideburns you have!” “All the better to attract the ladies,” replied Grandma incongruously. 最後，她終於到達了奶奶Super Do Me位於大稻城的薑餅屋。奶奶Super Do Me正躺在床上，看起來……不一樣了。而且渾身長滿了毛。 「奶奶，你的手真大！」Subbanger 驚呼道。 “這樣拿麵粉更方便，” 奶奶Super Do Me咕噥道，“冰桶裡有啤酒嗎？” “你的鬢角也真長！” 「這樣比較容易吸引女生的注意，」奶奶Super Do Me答非所問地說著。 Just then, Ginormous Clitoris burst through the door, having just got back from not Taipei 7-Eleven Hash. He was also wearing a red dress for some reason. “Teenvolf! You gobbled up my wife and put on her clothes!” Ginormous Clitoris shouted. “Ah fuck!” cried Teenvolf. Ginormous Clitoris picked up his ax and sliced open Teenvolf’s belly like a plump liverwurst. All his guts and viscera spilled out and amongst it all was Super Do Me in the best bloody red dress of them all. “Grandma!” yelped Subbanger. “Wife!” bellowed Ginormous Clitoris. “Time to recce the red dress run!” shouted Super Do Me. And they all lived hashily ever after. The end. 就在這時，Ginormous Clitoris猛地推門而入，顯然剛從台北7-11哈希回來。不知為何，他還穿著一件紅裙子。 「Teenvolf！你不僅吃了我老婆，還穿她的衣服！」Ginormous Clitoris吼道。 「啊，幹！」Teenvolf 叫道。 Ginormous Clitoris拿起斧頭，像切開一根肥美的肝腸一樣，把Teenvolf的肚子劈開了。他的五臟六腑都流了出來，包含Super Do Me穿著那件最美的血紅色連身裙。 「奶奶！」 Subbanger叫了一聲。 「老婆！」Ginormous Clitoris 大吼道。 「是時候去勘查紅洋裝跑的路線了！」Super Do Me 大喊。 從此，他們過上了混亂不堪的生活。故事結束。 Credits Banner: Homo Hobo Story: Hairless Hero Translation: Second Cumming ******WHO? / 誰?****** Hare 主兔: Super Do Me Cohare 副兔: Subbanger & Ginormous Clitoris ******WHAT? / 蝦咪******* A:A run / 路線：A to A S: 8 km + Elevation/爬升: 20 m L: 9.5 km + Elevation/爬升: 50 m *******WHEN / 啥時******* Date: Sunday, 28 Dec 2025 Time: Hares off at 14:00 兔子兩點起跑 *******WHERE / 哪兒******* Dadaocheng Wharf Container Market 大稻埕碼頭貨櫃市集 https://maps.app.goo.gl/EgCVneMhQvcmejuB6 ******HOW? / 怎去******* MRT to Shuanglian or Beimen then walk 捷運雙連站或北門站, 然後走路到A點 *******PRICE******* Men $250 Women $200 *******BASH / 晚餐******* Dadaocheng Wharf Container Market 大稻埕碼頭貨櫃市集 https://maps.app.goo.gl/EgCVneMhQvcmejuB6

Book Now

mailto:taiwanhashhouseharriers@gmail.com?subject=TwH3 #2638 Inquiry

When & Where

December 28, 2025 (2:00 pm) – December 28, 2025 (6:00 pm)

Dadaocheng Wharf Container Market 大稻埕碼頭貨櫃市集 https://maps.app.goo.gl/EgCVneMhQvcmejuB6