Details

“Shut the fuck up!” shouted Praying For Man Tits. The down downs fell silent. “I would like to call up everyone who didn’t see my extended vacation photos on Facebook!” A gaggle of hashers, none under 70, hobbled to the stage. “What’s Facebook?” said Duplicate. “What’s photos?” said Herman. An automated projector screen descended from the temple ceiling, to hushed gasps from the crowds. Gasps crescendoed into cheers as the display flashed on with a PowerPoint presentation titled “My Meals in China and Other Insects, by Praying For Man Tits GM PhD.” “Truly, he is a god!” shouted Bamboo earnestly. “This is superior to my tenure as GM!” said Cunt of the Litter humbly. 「他媽的都給我閉嘴！」Praying For Man Tits 大吼一聲。全場噹噹瞬間安靜。 「我現在要請所有沒看過我臉書超長假期照片的人上來！」 一群捷兔跑者蹣跚走上台，沒有一個年紀低於 70。 「臉書是啥？」Duplicate 問。 「照片是啥？」Herman 接著問。 一道自動投影布幕從神殿天花板緩緩降下，全場一陣壓抑的驚呼。 當畫面亮起，驚呼瞬間變成歡呼—— 投影片標題寫著：《我在中國吃的每一餐與其他昆蟲》by Praying For Man Tits GM PhD 「他真的是神！」Bamboo 發自內心地吼道。 「這比我當 GM 的時候還屌！」Cunt of the Litter 謙虛地說。 100 meters away, on a grassy knoll with a clear line of sight to the GM, a careful observer may have noticed that the light appeared somewhat distorted, as if fractured through some kind of transparent gel. If this observer was curious enough, and foolish enough, to approach and touch the area of disturbance, they would have felt the cold titanium exoskeletons of two exterminator robots disguised by active stealth camouflage: Call Me BB and Hunt-643. “Target acquired and locked,” Call Me BB transmitted through a shared aural interface. “Use me, BB,” said Hunt-643, “It is my purpose to be used in accordance with the mission. Eliminate Praying For Man Tits. BEEP!” Still cloaked by light-bending armor, Hunt-643’s bionic limbs bent at inhuman angles, locking into cavities along his torso. His neck bent back a full 90 degrees, and from his mouth emerged a powerful laser cannon. His prehensile member, composed of interlocking metal segments, curved to form a trigger. Call Me BB gripped his comrade-cum-cannon, pointed him at the GM, and squeezed the trigger. Praying For Man Tits was halfway through explaining how to butcher a grasshopper, when he was suddenly struck by a sustained beam of bright white light. But pierce his flesh it did not. 一百公尺外，一座小草坡上，若有夠細心、又夠白目的觀察者，會注意到光線似乎有點扭曲，像是被某種透明凝膠折射。如果這個人好奇心爆棚、智商歸零，走上前去摸了一下—— 他會摸到兩具冰冷的鈦合金外骨骼。 那是兩台披著主動隱身偽裝的滅殺機器人： Call Me BB 與 Hunt-643。 「目標鎖定完成。」Call Me BB 透過共享聽覺介面傳送訊息。 「使用我吧，BB。」Hunt-643 說， 「我存在的目的就是依任務被使用。消滅 Praying For Man Tits。逼！」 在光線彎折裝甲的掩護下，Hunt-643 的仿生肢體以非人角度折疊，卡進軀幹的凹槽；他的脖子整個向後彎了 90 度，一門強力雷射砲從嘴裡伸出。 而他那由金屬節片構成、可自由彎曲的部件，彎成了一個扳機。 Call Me BB 抓起他的「戰友兼武器」，瞄準 GM，扣下扳機。 Praying For Man Tits 正講到怎麼處理蚱蜢，胸口突然被一道持續的亮白雷射擊中—— 但，完全打不進去。 “He is truly the Chosen One,” shouted The Leash, “None but Tiny Balls shall penetrate him, for he is pure!” The laser continued to drive into the GM’s chest, but to no avail. “It’s not working!” shouted Call Me BB. Due to the commotion, and their linear processing units, neither he nor Hunt-643 noticed the time portal open directly above their heads. Nor did they notice two more killer cyborgs, Garmin Terminator and JustRolla-500, emerge on their own mission to destroy the GM. Garmin Terminator landed hard on Call Me BB, disabling both the laser beam and the camouflage. The hashers charged the robots. Call Me BB and Hunt-643 took flight. “On on!” shouted Praying For Man Tits, “ON ON!” 「他真的是天選之人！」The Leash 大喊， 「除了 Tiny Balls，沒人能進得了他，因為他是純潔的！」 雷射持續灌進 GM 的胸口，依然毫無效果。 「不行！沒用！」Call Me BB 大喊。 由於現場太吵，加上他們線性處理單元的限制，兩台機器人都沒注意到—— 一個時間傳送門在他們正上方打開了。 也沒注意到另外兩名殺手機器人 Garmin Terminator 與 JustRolla-500 為了同一個任務現身：摧毀 GM。 Garmin Terminator 重重落在 Call Me BB 身上，瞬間癱瘓了雷射與迷彩。 捷兔跑者們一擁而上衝向機器人。 Call Me BB 與 Hunt-643 立刻升空逃離。 「ON ON！」Praying For Man Tits 高喊， 「ON ON！」 Credits Banner: Homo Hobo Story: Hairless Hero Translation: Second Cumming ******WHO? / 誰?****** Hare 主兔: Call Me BB Cohare 副兔: Hunt-643 ******WHAT? / 蝦咪******* A:A run / 路線：A to A S: 7 km + Elevation/爬升: 450 m L: 9 km + Elevation/爬升: 600 m *******WHEN / 啥時******* Date: Sunday, 15 Feb 2026 Time: Hares off at 14:00 兔子兩點起跑 *******WHERE / 哪兒******* Dagouxi Waterfront Park 大溝溪生態治水園區 https://maps.app.goo.gl/Pcd76gKJrQ7BqRzH8 ******HOW? / 怎去******* MRT to Dahu Park Exit 1 then walk 10 minutes to A point 捷運大湖公園站出口1然後走路十分鐘到A點 *******PRICE******* Men $250 Women $200 *******BASH / 晚餐******* Shuizhong Xian Restaurant 水中鮮餐廳 https://maps.app.goo.gl/dQADTHNattnYGhM89

Book Now

mailto:taiwanhashhouseharriers@gmail.com?subject=TwH3 #2645 Inquiry

When & Where

February 15, 2026 (2:00 pm) – February 15, 2026 (6:00 pm)

Dagouxi Waterfront Park 大溝溪生態治水園區 https://maps.app.goo.gl/Pcd76gKJrQ7BqRzH8